Dude my mom stole all your condoms
The funny thing is... I'm about to go to the store to buy WD-40 and condoms... That's it.
And before you ask they are unrelated purchases.
some girl had on jean underwear. i hate america.
Today was my first day of hebrew and I learned how to say give me sex... I think I can quit now
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I dont think getting to 3rd base with a girl you barely know is the type of memory they had in mind when they named the park "memorial park"
He kept asking for nudes so I sent him a picture another guys dick. He called me ruthless.
You've got to be fucking kidding me. Do you think "Husband drunkenly pees all over floors" is reasonable grounds for divorce? So pissed off right now.
There's something really beautiful about walk of shaming past the Capitol.
FUCK and YOU. times 10. To infinity and beyond. You bastard. Worst. Cockblock. Ever. I'm going to nail your sister.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I didn't think this needed to be said, but our sexts are an emoji free zone
Welp. June's off to a great start. I just ripped my pants, completely sober, at 10:30 p.m.
His name was toto. That should have been my red flag
I think I'm emotionally ready to start being a slut again. I'm excited.
Also either i just launched into space as a rocket or my legs just orgasmed, but i am high as a soul train
Am i obligated to tell my sister her girlfriend was my one night stand three months ago?
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