just got dressed up for chatroulette- THAT desperate.
Lesbians. Lesbians everywhere.
I'll call it a relationship when I stop masturbating after he goes to sleep
what kind of one night stand wants to walk you home in the morning? whole diff kind of walk of shame.
It was one of those "wake up holding a random metal flower" kind of nights.
HOLY FUCK I JUST GOT WOKEN UP BY THUNDER!!!!!
I THINK I SHARTED
You called me a pussy and continued to eat an entire jar of peanut butter with only your hand.
It probably would have happened but I just can't picture myself losing my virginity while laying on top of his Quiksilver duvet set.
WHY WONT HOT GETMAN MAKR PUPR WITH ME!!!!???!?!!
My now ex hook up buddy realized I was hooking up with others when she saw my spotify sex playlist making appearances on fb. fml
Says the girl who left her friends to go have phone sex in the bathroom at Michael's
We both knew it was over when I took a u turn at her belly button.
I should buy myself lingerie for Valentine’s Day instead of a present for you because I am the present
This whole brainwashing thing is easy!
yeah, I woke up with nacho cheese crusted all over my face and head...a lone jalapeno still stuck in my ear...you win this round drunk nachos....
Randomize
