nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
I woke up this morning with my hair wrecked, a split lip, and an "H" on my right knee and a "I!" on my other knee.
Is all white too much for court to prove my innocents?
Need help. Super baked. Stuck on couch. Dying of thirst. Bring paint thinner or something to pry me off. Only thumbs and neck work.
I dropped my blunt out the window of a moving car by accident, tell me everything will be okay
I woke up next to her boyfriend and she woke up next to mine....
This is like a fucked up game of musical chairs.
i accidenteley seduced the christian girl's brother so i dont think we can count on free church picnic food again
I didn't have the heart to tell him that the reason my vagina was so "prelubricated" was because I had just had another gentleman caller an hour earlier. So, when he commented about how turned on I appeared, I just went with it.
That basically sounds like the worst party of my life, and I'm including my brother's World of Warcraft themed birthday party.
Visions of polite missionary are dancing in my head right now kinda and it alarms me
He literally just patted me on the vagina and said goodnight to it.
Just cropdusted a little kid that wouldn't get out of my way in Kroger. Welcome to the real world bitch.
I'm tryna think of an appropriate time to say "when I suck other dicks they seem like training dicks compared to yours" but I really can't think of a good way to say that
I was looking at your nipple and it made me think of you
Well I hope so...
You do realize last night you asked me if shampoo had an expiration date then cried for 15 mins when I told you it did
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