Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
I just had the fat girl at the party come tell me I look sad and offer me a beer. I'm out.
Two people in the coffee shop I'm at are on a date and talking about how acid has affected them and the girl just mentioned meth. Fuck studying, this just got interesting.
there's a sledge hammer in the bottom of the swimming pool... so whatever happened last night was probably awesome
his mom cheated on his dad so i think he has a weird freudian thing for whores
and then you started talkingabout how you wish birth control was disspensed as a candy necklace
LSD in a sugar cube. Dropped it in my whiskey sour and felt like I was rowing a boat.
Your subconscious sucks. Mine is awesome. I have a recurring dream where I manage a chocolate factory run by big titted hookers.
A) you're a liar. B) that would be awesome.
They made the rule if I caught the ball with my cleavage they would drink the entire beer pong table. I don't think they expected me to actually do it.
I've known you for the past two years. You never kid about biology or alcohol.
Thursday could be nutella day. You could make me a nutella sandwich and then fuck me senseless
Tell me how you feel about belly buttons
My walk of shame turned into having to get his dad to tow my best friends car out of the snowbank in his driveway
Just cuz u chase vodka with sweet tea doesn't make it sweet tea vodka
I just kept eating and watching him slide down the stairs head first
Randomize
