I puked in a mailbox on the way back from your house.
You saying I have a drinkingg problem is like saying Superman has a flying problem.
I want a gay best friend. or apple sauce either one is fine with me
Over it. He probably jacked off to bible verses last night. I don't want that
Soo I got blood taken today and when the doctor came back with the results she said "you aren't sick but the tests show that you are currently drunk..."
I wish I had a "puke in your car" emoticon
Theres a picture of you hanging up on the wall in mcdonalds, i'm impressed
I only put bad things in my body...jack, caffeine, chocolate, pills, and rich's cock. It's like being holistic but exactly opposite
They just built a gym in the same parking lot as my favorite bar. Drunk me is gonna be so excited.
our friendships a beautiful delicate flower...that has been crushed by peni
My neck is PURPLE. This is NOT a good day to be indoctrinated by the cardinal...
I have an interview tomorrow! The couple we regularly swing with said I could use them as references. Winning
I'm no longer puke free since 2013 am I.
I may or may not have spent student loan money on a vibrator, that falls under living expenses right?
Can you come over?
Sex??
Sure but there’s also a squirrel in my garage I need you to take care of.
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