i told him i was on my period. he said, and i quote "can we not just lay down some newspapers or something?"
Banjos are just sex machines. Like lights to moths, banjos are to hipster bitches.
you were leaning against the vending machine asking if there was a shower you could puke in.
Dude, the cops never think it's as funny as you do.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
If you fool around, take the WHITE sweatshirt off of her first. It's mine, and I don't like your cum nearly as much as she does.
REAL PEOPLE DRINK 3 BEERS ALONE WILL WATCHING THE LIFETIME MOVIE ABOUT PRINCE WILLIAM AND KATE MIDDLETON
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
You should fuck with them and beat off in the cup and then walk out an be like, "This was a sperm donation right?"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I may or may not have traded your body to the rodeo's owner for free beer.
I literally walked into the toilet, looked at my reflection, said "alcohol" and went back to bed...
New Mean Girls drinking game: Everytime someone says Africa or Math, chug.
Medicine hack, old crowe and ramen flavor packets isnt a cure for the cold.
You were in no condition to manage a 3-way.
Just fell down the stairs..might wanna call the ambulance jus take the weed out of my pocket be4 they come..
Randomize