dude we were spooning naked in bed with her ass in my crotch. she sharted in her sleep all over my dick.
Let me tell you a story about the rise and fall of my self esteem
normally I beat off every night before I go to bed even though my little brother sleeps in the same room. So I was starting to last night, and he jumped out of bed and said "Fuck, Im not listening to this shit again" We havent talked since. fuck me
I didn't realize how much I missed him until his balls were back in my mouth..
Clearly I understand physics better when I'm on cocaine
So, do you think I should wash the ashes off of my forehead before going to the strip club?
Periouds do not concern me. Biploogival needs are buological needs.
Is there really anything more beautiful than opening a fresh box of wine on a Friday afternoon?
I just quit my job so I could get dick this weekend. I'm pretty sure my need for dick is much more important than the customers' needs.
He was smart enough to bring a condom to our study date so I mean I'm sure he'll do fine on the test
Do you sleep with the same women I've already slept with on purpose?
He's my favorite late night booty call. He lives next to a Wendy's.
He was tripping his balls off and kept aggressively saying SIT ON MY FACE. 5 hours and countless orgasms later I've decided I must never let this man go.
Right before he dumped me... he got a really ugly pair of pants. They were twill pants. A pinkish color. When I'm sad... I picture him in them. It makes me smile.
It's magical, I'm just dancing. It's like prom but by myself and with less clothes.
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