Texts From Last Night

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  (816): View more from Missouri

  I really want to fuck my wifes sister.

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  (816): I really want to fuck my wifes sister. http://tfl.nu/nla0
  Replies (42) Good night (1128) Bad night (4409)
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  (503): View more from Oregon

  can you please tell me why I'm bleeding so heavily from my ass and all my makeup is gone?

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  (503): can you please tell me why I'm bleeding so heavily from my ass and all my makeup is gone? http://tfl.nu/oqh6
  Replies (33) Good night (902) Bad night (13182)
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  (850): View more from Florida

  She said she didn't think she should have to shave either. Guess no shave November just became no sex November.

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  (850): She said she didn't think she should have to shave either. Guess no shave November just became no sex November. http://tfl.nu/riz6
  Replies (90) Good night (954) Bad night (5827)
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  (315): View more from New York

  I woke up face first on my living room floor arms outstretched toward the christmas tree

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  (315): I woke up face first on my living room floor arms outstretched toward the christmas tree http://tfl.nu/o54r
  Replies (4) Good night (4601) Bad night (707)
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  (860): View more from Connecticut

  my vagina's been through so much this weekend

  (1-860): View more from Connecticut

  you mean so much has been through your vagina this weekend?

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  (860): my vagina's been through so much this weekend (1-860): you mean so much has been through your vagina this weekend? http://tfl.nu/jr6r
  Replies (35) Good night (7677) Bad night (1045)
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  (405): View more from Oklahoma

  so I'm in athletic shorts, a suit jacket and I'm still drunk at 6:30am at the last leg of relay for life

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  (405): so I'm in athletic shorts, a suit jacket and I'm still drunk at 6:30am at the last leg of relay for life http://tfl.nu/i5i3
  Replies (13) Good night (4305) Bad night (885)
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  (727): View more from Florida

  I fell alseep but then some dude picked me up. Comforter and all stuck a blunt in my mouth and carried me back downstairs because "I wasn't done partying"

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  (727): I fell alseep but then some dude picked me up. Comforter and all stuck a blunt in my mouth and carried me back downstairs because "I wasn't done partying" http://tfl.nu/wtiy
  Replies (19) Good night (10786) Bad night (1333)
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  (717): View more from Pennsylvania

  whiskey dick. though we did manage to break my closet door and flood the bathroom.

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  (717): whiskey dick. though we did manage to break my closet door and flood the bathroom. http://tfl.nu/6izn
  Replies (4) Good night (836) Bad night (2002)
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  (256): View more from Alabama

  Apparently riding the dog like its a small horse is frowned upon in this establishment

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  (256): Apparently riding the dog like its a small horse is frowned upon in this establishment http://tfl.nu/eim1
  Replies (20) Good night (2867) Bad night (1239)
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  (541): View more from Oregon

  Getting sick, pulled the filter off a camel crush and rolled it into my joint to clear my sinuses. If there were stoner awards, I'd receive one.

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  (541): Getting sick, pulled the filter off a camel crush and rolled it into my joint to clear my sinuses. If there were stoner awards, I'd receive one. http://tfl.nu/3exv
  Replies (15) Good night (1405) Bad night (564)
• Favorite

  (212): View more from New York

  All I know is....there's beer in my camera. How do I know? Because I can pick up my camera,shake it and HEAR, the beer in it

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  (212): All I know is....there's beer in my camera. How do I know? Because I can pick up my camera,shake it and HEAR, the beer in it http://tfl.nu/vzev
  Replies (2) Good night (477) Bad night (1170)
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  (404): View more from Georgia

  Just had the "whores are people too" talk with Mom. Bright side it's Christmas, and I may have been drunk, I don't think she caught on.

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  (404): Just had the "whores are people too" talk with Mom. Bright side it's Christmas, and I may have been drunk, I don't think she caught on. http://tfl.nu/451u
  Replies (7) Good night (708) Bad night (821)
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  (847): View more from Illinois

  So far in the last ten minutes I have tried to pour cereal into a plate. Today's gonna be a great day.

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  (847): So far in the last ten minutes I have tried to pour cereal into a plate. Today's gonna be a great day. http://tfl.nu/zt4q
  Replies (1) Good night (689) Bad night (389)
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  (269): View more from Michigan

  So scratching an ex marines beard, telling him "nice hairy pussy." then when he opens his mouth to respond, I started fingering his mouth. Needless to say was a horrible idea

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  (269): So scratching an ex marines beard, telling him "nice hairy pussy." then when he opens his mouth to respond, I started fingering his mouth. Needless to say was a horrible idea http://tfl.nu/13gp
  Replies (5) Good night (583) Bad night (1618)
• Favorite

  (775): View more from Nevada

  Seriously insulted!! You can not share my dick pick with your gay brother. He won't quit poking me on fb

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  (775): Seriously insulted!! You can not share my dick pick with your gay brother. He won't quit poking me on fb http://tfl.nu/8yg9
  Replies (4) Good night (732) Bad night (269)

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