You can spell. I can kill people with no remorse. We all have our skills.
Just mADE A PArabola og urine
i havee beer in my backseat and a glow in the dark condom in my cleaveage.
you're going for the gold here.
i kept saying "bloody hell" in a ron weasley accent until i forcibly told myself to shut up
if you don't go out with us, what are you gonna do? you're gonna go home and watch biodome and masturbate to texts from your east coast boyfriend and see the facebook pictures from the party when you wake up.
She vajazzled her vag. It was as useless as putting earrings on chewbacca
no i brought the cat to the bar. I got a weird look when I walked in but now everyone loves her.
I had something called a trashcan. Never again. I almost fucked chewbacca.
Never visiting again. You guys drink like immortals
There's a quesaritto in the oven. Neither of us have been to Taco Bell in 3 weeks.
I'll just say I told you so at your funeral
If I could I'd magically teleport drugs and alcohol to you. Like a bad decision fairy.
I just used a coke ridden $20 bill to buy Girl Scout cookies
Why in the hell is there a guy dressed up as a horse passed out in our kitchen.
happy birthday!
You ran the halls of the dorm naked handing out condoms. You were the sex fairy. Best you can do if you're not getting laid.
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