Oh and ps....i was sleeping soundly until i woke up by the sound of amy on the phone with her mom sobbing hysterically because she can't stop having the shits.
I'm pretty sure I have jizz on the back of the dress I wore to church. Awesome.
Just bought lingerie with the intention of wearing it as a shirt. It's going to be that kind of weekend.
Let's paint friendship bongs
All of her cloths were on our coffee table this morning. The only things she left with last night were her shoes and Scott
i woke up and found a picture of his grandma in my purse.. im a kelpto
Dude, the coffee is horrible this morning, Cass changed something about it
We ran out of Bailey's Irish cream...
This is what regular coffee tastes like?!?! Fuck the adult life.
THE HALLOWEEN QUEST WILL BE PICS OF US IN OUR COSTUMES IN EXCHANGE FOR DICK PICS. IT HAS BEEN DECIDED.
I appreciate the I'll come bail you out of jail tone in the text
So I ate half a jar of mayo because I thought it would cure a hangover. I thought wrong.
I'm still alive btw, in case you were worried about my well being.
I'm like a saiyan, every time I get trashed I come back stronger
you were screaming "I don't need a shirt!" repeatedly while in the process of taking it off and flashing the bouncer. we got kicked out. thanks a lot.
i made that whipped coffee shit today. took six pouches of instant espresso.
please tell me you didn’t consume six shots of espresso
:)
i can feel colors
I’m going to hump him until his teeth hurt and then I’m going to have my way with him
Randomize
