The paper boy just woke me up in the front yard again.
So at this point...I'm sure you heard the story about Saturday night
i am about to cut my stepbrother's hair into a mohawk with the same clippers i use to trim my pubes. god is so on my side today.
i wish i was a boy too so i knew what a blow job felt like
tolerance is too high. going on a liquor strike. ghandi style.
No. I didn't know. I thought mid afternoon shots meant the day could only get better.
He ran headfirst into the atm. Thenasmed us what our spirit animals were...he said his was either a dolphin or a cabbage
he put $150 on the cabs dash so 9 of us could pile in and ride 3 blocks to the apartment.
Did you bedazzle the elevator?
At this point I will cuddle anything to prevent from dying alone
Waking up with a sore back because you put the team on it for jager pong all night
The cops raided her house the day before class even started
Those assholes are becoming so efficient
I vaguely remember seeing that couple making out in front of that store and i yelled "I ALSO LOVE THE ROCKY MOUNTAIN SOAP COMPANY!"
Uhmm, it's called hentai.
I DON'T CARE WHAT IT'S CALLED I DON'T WANT TO SEE IT ON MY WORK COMPUTER
I'll be naked. By 11. Then arrested. Drunk tank adventures
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