I just got hit in the face by an old lady love handle.
All I can see in the pic you sent is white shorts...
Thas my pasnts in colleg! Tehy glow! AND SMELL LIKE BEER!
Sry I came all over your dress. Think of it as a Vegas souvenir.
'Well you know, stuff happens' isn't really an excuse for sticking a cheeto in my ear
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No. I'm drinking straight up vodka right now. With a pineapple in it.
That'll put some boobs in that bra.
But the Super Mario beer pong table is more than appropriate.
I'm naked, I'm drunk, and I'm all up on social media right now
She just walked up to him and was like "you should fuck Angela" and it worked! She is the ultimate wingman
I encourage you to ignore feeling. Drinking more helps
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Am I getting cock blocked by karaoke? That's a first.
we've never stayed at a party for more than an hour. we always end up at a pizzaria. by ourselves. with no friends.
what else are best friends for?
I'll be an awkward "I've had the grooms penis in my mouth" presence and we can party our nipples off.
Just left the ER. Only good thing... my hot ass nurse Carlos stripped me.
God works in mysterious ways.
its like probably shouldnt be sending pics of your asshole to strangers who work in the same building as you
Trying to figure out these fractions. I bought 5 fifths of gin last week. Does that mean I have one whole gin? 5/5 = 1, right? You're having to homeschool your kids right now--so ask them.
Randomize