Evryone should know as good ramen noodle cooked in beer sounds... its not
.....so he has a son. Josh. That is not his roommate
she said, "is it ok if I touch it?" that's when I knew I was in trouble... I knew she was a virgin but seriously..
he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
The doctor wrote 'condom retrieval' on my discharge paper.
I don't want to talk about her cat for two hours only to dry hump till I'm blistered. Not worth it.
i just want to attach a dildo to the ceiling and ride it like a gay spiderman.
The cougar has a calendar on her wall of when she can give topless handjobs again. I pity her husband.
mhmm. we know where to go, which places have free bathrooms, how long you can be in one until its sketchy, we have this down to a science. we're like the college sophomore pregaming dream team
Just smoked a joint with the hottest patient. God I love night shifts.
My apartment is so clean right now, I should invite someone over for sex just so someone can see how clean it is.
Texting people and counting condoms..we have like fourteen. Goal for this week: use all of them
just had an allergic reaction to my dildo. My life is ruined.
We have been dating for 5 months. I'm friends with his sister. Yet my number in his phone is still saved as "hot bartender"
I'm starting to notice a direct correlation between blackouts and broken bones...
Randomize
