that's an acceptable place to lick
Ya I got a cut on my head from the toilet seat last time I drank there.
She tried to kill herself by taking a whole packet of panadol. I mean HELLO THAT'S ME EVERY SUNDAY MORNING.
i told him i was allergic to semen. he pulled out an epipen.
You know it's a good party when even the dealers were too fucked up. Just found and counted 140 E pills I found in a bag in the couch. Just paid for weed this month.
I am the sex elephant in the room. Again.
Hey do you have any hot friends that would settle for less?
I'm not saying you did or didn't sleep with him but he's has your thong hanging from his ceiling fan
the last time I drank tequila I ended up riding your skateboard nude down the street... so yeah, I'll have a few shots.
And noooow we're smoking a ton of REALLY strong weed and THIS IS THE SOFTEST CAT EVER
So to add to headbutting the microwave while waiting for my hot pockets to cook. I apparently told both bartenders earlier in the night I was going to fuck them both. I hate black out drunk me..
Well. At least he's a gentleman. A gentleman satanist.
Needless to say, I did not go home with him cause he kinda resembled a guppy fish.
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone
you were on a whole other level. you went home with him because he said "you got some light ass eyes"
Randomize