Bea Arthur died! :(
What?
Big bird passed.
She had a muffin-top while wearing a one piece bathing suit. Thats gotta break one of newton's laws or something
of course. lets lasso hookers.
his penis is PERFECT
I want to put it in a shoebox and place cottonbls around it to protect it from any harm
or knit it little hat
she was pooping while we were on video chat. new level of love.
He asked me if I could call his penis destroyer... Uhh SOS.
i should do something illegal before my birthday. as of thursday im old enough to go to jail.
What's the proper amount of time to avoid my 76 year old neighbor that caught me with my pants down, peeing in my driveway at 5am?
Him cheating on his girlfriend resulted in a $1500 hospital bill from repeated blows to his testicles by my ass. They diagnosed his pain as "testicle trauma". Sex karma at it's finest.
looking at my texts from you makes me want to throw up in my pants
There is a direct correlation between gooch size and male fertility. Science.
"This must be what Jayden Smith feels like all the time"
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
And you know what the worst part is? Because of him I can now relate to a goddamn Taylor Swift song. FUCK. MY. LIFE.
Do you just want me to shit in a Jack-o-latern
Randomize