He asked to "fluff my boner.."
he wanted to have sex on the little rocking chair but i was too high to figure out how to do that so we did it on the floor.
just puked in a purse in the store. some girl asked if i was gonna buy it now and i laughed and asked her why id want a bag some dude just puked in. her face looked like she saw the devil.
his penis is PERFECT
I want to put it in a shoebox and place cottonbls around it to protect it from any harm
or knit it little hat
i just successfully used the word "hymen" in a paper...welcome to senior seminar in lit.
you can think of my virginity as your little souveneir from our relationship.
Dude squirt doesnt even begin to describe it i thought she was the lost portal to atlantis with how much she let out
I'm not trying to be dramatic but if someone makes you choose between getting a Brazilian or dying. For the sake of your sanity just fucking die
I have an erection and I'm about to go through airport security.
My guy issues hinge on tonight's game. Caps win, it's Dustin. Rangers win, Josh. I even flipped a coin to see who got what team
Fuck you and your fucking taquito's.
Well, if it's rabies, your lips will swell just prior to the frothing. Get a lot of good pics!
Since when do my one night stands start sending you friend requests?
Taking a shit in a Texas 7/11... not accepting phone calls now lol
You’re better off without him. Actually, he’s better off without you and that’s what really matters
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