Almost ran you over in the parking lot. You look good
Apparently when he woke up I was tripping my face off. Everytime the cat meowed I would meow back. This went on for several hours.
it was like fucking the hulk in a smartcar
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
I just ate a cashew that looked EXACTLY like your dick.
Just fucked in his moms tanning bed. While it was on. Weirdest. Tan. Ever.
Welp, she's chewing our paper towels again. She's like an obnoxiously hot puppy
I ended up in a shower with 9 people and a bunch of unopened beer last night. I think I got peed on. Hands were everywhere. We sold the peed on beer to people knocking on the hotel room door.
Wow, now I'm sad I didn't go.
I know. My only sports are biking to buy drugs and running from the police.
You can wear my underwear. It'll be like old times.
I woke up and they were watching power rangers in japanese so I just found my bra and left
Sailor Jerry came over for the evening. It was a magical evening. I didn't even get puke in the house.
Soooo, hypothetically, how long would roommates have to sleep together before its considered dating...
Its because she suspects I'm a frequent drug user, which I am, but I am going to make her feel like she is crazy for believing it.
Having a bangable neighbor is going to ruin my booty call game. I refuse to go across town for dick now
Randomize
