I chose taco bell over sex...
good choice.
So I've decided that when I turn 50 and have to have a colonoscopy I'm going to leave a surprise for the doctor to find.
woke up to moans and hushed"we can't do this with him in here." hope they had a good time
he told me my vagina needed a tic tac
What do ugly girls do when they get too drunk at parties. They can't pull the whole "sorry i passed out on your couch but i'm hot so it doesn't matter "card
mid blow job she looked up and said "we aren't even facebook friends!"
I have no idea. But that is beside the point bc in vegas I'm a pro vball player from Ireland and a veterinarian on the weekends
On a scale of 1-10 how seriously are we considering being sugar babies?
I'm about a 7.95
You. Dating a sex offender cop. Life writes itself sometimes.
He had a drawn-on fu manchu and now my vagina has one too.
we could do so many fantastic illegal things together. sexually and otherwise.
Want to have dinner and we can talk about how my vagina can make you feel better?
I just watched a magician wearing a fedora deep throat a balloon\n
Thanks for supporting me through Robs retirement. I'm still in shock, but your dick helped.
So I took a screenshot of my boarding pass and the TSA agent somehow swiped it to the next photo. Yep...TSA saw my dick before I even went through the body scanner.
Randomize
