I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
something about eating while taking a crap just doesn't seem safe to me.
They're donating plasma together for extra money. Couple of the fucking century.
I think it was the chocolate body paint and awesome blowjob that finally made us official.
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i hate always having to make my eye shadow look really good since my eyes always end up closed by the end of the night in pics
alcohol. turning childhood friends into awkward hookups since the dawn of civilization.
Thats the last thing I remember and then I woke up in this Dutch kids dorm and he was taking a picture of me while I was sleeping
Hey when you wake up and read this, we really need to stop pullin our dicks out when we drink dude. I have all the pics, yall are assholes
He tied me to the bed, fucked me and left me tied up until he proved to his room mates that he actually fucked me. But other than that, best sex ever!
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One failed naked backward somersault off the bed and I realize - I either need to drink less or workout more. Perhaps both.
Halloween is the end of the singles holidays they don't start again until st. Patrick's day we better get wifed up or it's going to be a long winter lol
After last night I never want to be in the back of a cop car again. No leg room.
Update on my sex life: my calves are sore from masturbating too much. It's a thing. Look it up.
I'm thankful I didn't get drunk and shit my pants this year. 🦃
If sex isn’t mentioned at least three times at the dinner table, I’m not interested...
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