So that's a yes to the cocaine usage and a no to the rollerblading
i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
I making dinner, so you might want to actually come home tonight.
oh, you finally did the dishes then?
No, bought new ones.
Hey. I found $5 in quarters from one of those state quarter collection books. I'm using it for food tomorrow.
How's work?
Spinning.
I'm worried I'm going to miss my flight so I set a series of alarms on my phone to act as checkpoints to make sure I'll be there. 2am-stop drinking; 4am-stop fucking stephanie, get some sleep; 5am-wake up, fuck stephanie once more; 6am-get to the airport
On second thought, trying to signify she was a butter face by wiping my bagel on her cheek may not have been in my best of interests
well what is some mechanical horse racing with out blow involved
Shotgunning beers to finish a midterm project at 3am is a good idea right?
Well. I guess talking about me stealing your wife may not be in the list of legit conversations
I told him about the time I blacked out and shit myself and he still wanted to have sex with me that night. Feeling pretty optimistic about where this fling is going.
Like I fucked him in the shower at 3 am when I had classes all day the next day so he can't say I'm not dedicated
I literally forgot every French word I knew and blurted out “mange moi” so he went down on me like I was some baguette fresh outta the oven!!!! I passed out.
She said she didn't care that I was gay and wants to ride the fucking rainbow
I just folded my laundry and I washed 3 pairs of underwear and 6 jizz towels. Clearly I'm quarantining right.
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