Yeah I gave the girl a dirty look. And only a three dollar tip.
i found a dude playing guitar on the portapotty
Im in Brooklyn, he wasnt 23 or a musician pick me up
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
Just saying goodbye until I figure this whole "warrant out for my arrest" thing
I'm sorry but that single bed couldn't hold all five of us, especially with those boobs.
Picking up hoes with my dad is going to make it a little harder, but ay, if thats how he wants to bond after 23 years, Ill give it a shot
WAIT DID YOU MAIL ME A KITTEN
I'm in a waiting room at the hospital - and there's a dude here who is WAY too proud of his urine sample.
Cover your phone. Photos of streaking frat guys incoming.
Don't you judge us. Sockets make ideal bowls
did i make more ranch sandwiches last night
you had 4
He smells like cinnamon, and what I imagine to be orgasms
Dude I just realized i did a camper walk of shame in front of amish people. I should have asked for cheese and a home made pie to cover it up. Im just lost shopping in amish country nothing to see here
Idk if I want to put a bra on
Randomize
