I ahte it when I peed a little on my shews. I got a litll bit on the automen in your room too.:/
Tracy!! I don't have an ottoman in my room.
Ohhh....do you have a dog shaped liek un automan?
She rubs her butt on the bed & then she growls..
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
my mom just poured a water bottle of wine to take my dog on a walk...
the fda needs to get their shit together cause these four loko going away parties are gonna kill me
Lets just not get arrested. That might put a damper on everything. I only say that cause i've almost been arrested.
I have discovered that there is nothing that a giant penis attached to a southern accent can't talk me into. yee-haw!
Operation: sleep in every bed at the boys' house is nearing completion. Now at 5/9. I AM GOLDILOCKS AND NO ONE CAN STOP ME
How big of a disservice to the economy would we be doing if we didn't drink every day holiday break?
Living in the dorms has served one purpose and one purpose only for me: to teach me that pooping in public bathrooms is okay and that I can do it
When and where the fuck did we get a beach ball??
You were talking to yourself and eating cold cuts in the kitchen when I found you
She wouldn't eat a clam- if you blow a line pregnant you can eat a clam
Get your dick back in here. On Saturdays, you're not allowed to leave my bed unless it's to make me bacon or coffee.
Fuck this pandemic. She grabbed the hand sanitizer instead of the hand lotion while giving me a hand job and now my dick is burning and scrotum are on fire
A hand job? Are you 12?
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