it sounded like he was fisting a can of crisco.
yeah, we don't understand. the wings losing for guys is like girls finding objects in their body..just weird and sad
you ran into the room and announced "I JUST FUCKED HER IN THE ASS". apparently you forgot she left the bedroom 5 minutes before you and was standing with us all.
dude smells like cheese burgers and loose women...... i want his life
I dont care how high you are, meat and sprinkles dont mix dude
well what she called a "work function" most people call "doing shots with your boss while people throw napkins at you."
Well now I have my semen on her headphones
She just fell in the river. Meet us downstream with the bottle.
Well anything after a French guy would have been a disappointment. But I'm fairly certain he was just trying to masturbate into me.
I'm sorry I pissed in your bedroom and then woke you up when I tried to jump off the balcony
he was wearing a pyjama shirt under a dress shirt under a hoodie under a robe under a rain poncho the man was prepared for anything
Sometimes I just take my boobs out of my shirt so they can get some fresh air
I thought he was hot. You know, in a “I’ve gone batshit insane and want blood for the blood god” sort of way.
You asked me how red your eyes were... they were shut.
There is way too much butt cleavage here for a formal event.
Randomize
