He is fucking rediculously sexy. DO HIM NOW. NOW. NOW. NOW.
I love reading their "i love you more" , "no i love you more" war on facebook today knowing that he hooked up with me last night. I bet i know who wins that one.
Hey I have to teach you how to run in heels before vegas
You guessed 7 of 8 bra sizes correctly. You're like a drunk rainman.
They should try giving mcdonalds to cancer patients because it just cured the worst hangover ive ever had
She gave me a foot massage with her tongue. I think we're both scarred for life.
I told her that if she blew me I would give her the empty pizza box in the fridge.... Why did she agree?
Im surprised putting the throwing knife "dartboard" next to the door didnt end up worse
If i theoretically had to put an iv back in what do I need to do?
I think my hopes are too high for this one. The only other bachelorette party I've been to I was felt up by a Chippendale's dancer and smoked a joint with the party bus driver.
today i was walking through gramercy with a dress bag from David's Bridal and a bag of McDonald's. No guy would make eye contact with me as I scarfed down my fries. I think I was mankind's walking night terror.
do you ever just look around and think about how great it is to have depth perception? Like it's really, really cool when u think about it
PLEASE HELP ME THE AMERICANS ARE YELLING ABOUT TURKEY, I DON'T KNOW WHAT TO DO
No one with a hairstyle like that is allowed to insult anyone for anything
The last I heard from her she said she was going to plant sunflowers, get drunk on white wine and listen to Everybody Wants to Rule the World on repeat.
Randomize
