I was totally willing to let her keep giving me blowjobs as long as she didn't think we were in a relationship.
If he doesn't notice me by the next party, i'm just gonna go up to him and pll his pants down and blow him.
Sounds like a plan.
well what is some mechanical horse racing with out blow involved
Just FYI, I'm breaking up with my boyfriend tonight and you need to be on call to be my first rebound bang
i think he spiked my sandwich with a viagra
she cut her forehead open playing a drunken game of pin the tail on the donkey and now she's having a panic attack.
Yea I've gotten enough hickeys in my life to know what I'd look like with a neck tattoo. I think I'm getting a neck tattoo.
So I'm thinking that so long as I have this piercing, I'm going to get tested for explosives at the airport
I will always make you feel special and slightly offended. That's my job.
I ran into cvs barefoot with my belt undone and shirt buttoned wrong and didn't even have to ask. The guy working pointed and said "they're back there."
That's how I look going for the pbr.
Bianca brought a stripper home he's making me breakfast
You gave him that scrunchie you made and called it your "sex offering".
This morning we had sex while he was wearing a full length fur jacket and sunglasses... I wasn't even phased
is it sad that the highlight of my saturday night was waiting till 3 in the morning to hear about your saturday night?
I've got two reasons for you to come over later and one of them is pierced.
Randomize
