She announced her abortion via fbk
making cat noises will not fix the situation.
for halloween i should be pregnant. what is scarier than that?!
I just experienced a full blown christian wedding. I am SO GLAD YOUR WEDDING WASNT THIS.
it makes more sense than having a misplaced asshole
im not talking about this
I know I said that I'd stop dating 20 year olds... but at least this one's not my student...
I was just compiling a top 5 blowjobs list and that's in there for sure.
He's the kind you'd bring home and you'd wake up and all your food would be half eaten on the kitchen floor and all your socks would be missing.
I know. It's cray. Crayon. Crayolaaaaa.
You're like the Mr. T of my A-team, only less gold jewelry and more pitying of fools.
That's the nicest thing anyone has said to me all day.
It's not that I'm in love with her, so much as I would love to be her lesbian experience.
I just gave an orange Froot Loop the finger for falling on the floor instead of my mouth when I was pouring a mini box of cereal into my face.
No, supporting your unemployed boyfriend IS NOT what credit cards are for.
I guess I'm an especially affectionate person under the influence of tequila.
Boys winking, cowboys tipping their hats, old people looking disappointed.... ah, I had forgotten the unholy powers of exposed cleavage!
You are my hero.
Randomize
