you would have Pina Colada flavored saliva.
zippers are such a cool invention
Nah, lets use your guy, my drug dealer is going all pineapple express on me
Guess who got arrested for public drunkiness, and called jimmy johns for the entire station last night instead of someone to bail me out? The cop that arrested me drove me home. Win.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just discovered Kim Possible porn. Life is now complete.
I think it was you who decided that coming home at 3AM and cooking eggs topless was the best way to end our night. Eating the scrambled eggs off each other's boobs, that was ellie's idea
Yep. Just threw myself a bachelorette party with my coworkers penis before I re-enter the holy order of monogomous relationships.
Yeah. she rolled up to the party on a unicycle then peed in the bushes. TA of the year.
she tends to only attract lesbians and homeless men
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And is it bad that I haven't talked to guys who I haven't already dated? I feel like a recycle bin.
He said "just hugs" and ran away screaming.
So it may have been laced, sue me.
Wow has his pick up routine ever gotten bad. He is trying to use cheese as a way to flirt with the waitress
Oh man, he played the Harvarti cheese card and it didn't work. Now he is flailing
It's not my fault, Tequila turned all my alarms off.
A girl showed up in my tinder and I have it set to only men... I super liked her because I need a lesbian experience
If a weird guy texts you in the near future asking if you are satan just go with it
Randomize