Wow, this guy is harder to get rid of than gum in pubic hair
I don't have the money to get a cast so we made one from stuff at the craft store.
after the first blizzard, i went out and bought a thirty and put it in a cooler and hid it out in the backyard. now the second blizzard has deposited 2 feet of snow on top of said cooler. there is a shovel and treasure map over here waiting for you
i woke up to my roomate hitting me in the head with a can of PBR at 8:30 in the morning...i love spring break
I either just got cockblocked or saved from a lengthy court case so I'm kinda conflicted about how my night went.
Then he told me he was proud of me for remembering that i blew him that night.. Maybe my drinking is getting out of hand.
I said I was going to sleep an hour ago. Now I'm making plans to get high with the guy who mows your lawn.
I told my doctor about us having twin chlamydia
This is that think about life weed. Thank god I'm in American lit this semester. I can actually write papers in this vat of introspective stoned.
Only you could successfully troll for dick at a Hillel bake sale.
That's fine. It's not illegal to bring ham into a museum.
I don't think tits should taste like fish.
? I'm just sitting watching something borrowed alone, crying in my boxers , feel like I should probably do something
Honestly, if you don't have a lawsuit pending against you by this time tomorrow, I'll be impressed.
Why can't he see that I don't want a slow getting to know you period? I just want to bone. NOW.
Randomize
