He came through my line today and bought designer impostor perfume, just for men gel, and astroglide. I almost DIED.
She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
worms taste like bacon by the way.
I always wondered what they tasted like.
is it bad i banged a 25yr kindergarten teacher last night?
No thats like a top 10
You remember those guys we called the police on after they stole our keg? Turns out one of them is a student instructor in one of my classes. Figuring out how best to use this information.
Hey welcome to Rick's drunk text tree. Rick is drunk right now please respond with "shut up" to remove your name from this list. Thanks for playing.
I AM OVERLY HIGH AND OVERLY AWARE OF MY TONGUE IN MY MOUTH
I feel a five day drunk coming on.
Discovered a freckle on my clitoris. What have you done today?
As a plus, I've lost 5 pounds in two days, so "party all weekend" is officially a valid diet plan.
At one point she whispered in my ear "I overdrew my bank account today" but besides that it was an awesome lap dance
He was basically a horny puppy - following me around all night and kept sticking his hand down my pants.
I'm pretty sure the cop knew you were drunk when you tried to light your cigg with a chapstick.
She’s super into those renaissance faires. But, if you can’t actually stab anyone, what’s the point?
scale of one to ten how loathsome is it to save my chocolate easter bunny to use for a topping on my edibles
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