i am only reminding you that showing off your fellatio skills on vegetables is probably not an appropriate party trick
Dude, she knew her leg was on fire and she kept dancing. Bad-fucking-ass.
I wasn't sure if "you're even prettier in the dark" was a compliment. Hmm.
we decided to do a scavenge hunt for ourself for when we walked back to our apartments. We hid taco bell behind some bushes. I think they are still good.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Hes still mad that I left the room mid-hookup to go get a pickle from the fridge.
God that barista is texting me bout his life like i care i mean dude just hook me up with free coffee thats why i gave you my number
Dude you were sitting on a bench on the street with her for 45 minutes thinking you were on the bus
I would rather burn my vagina off with a damn flame thrower before I would touch anything that has touched her skank ass.
Just consider it? What else do you have going on today that could be as awesome as a day full of lord of the rings and sex?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
My New Years Resolution is to get everyone to start talking like a 40 year old douchebag. From now on, you will only refer to me as Chief.
It's all fun and games until your AARP eligible neighbors end up blacking out in your yard at 5pm with a box of franzia. I'm feeling a great year ahead
Boise Idaho, where you have a one night stand with someone from your town 3 states away and run into them the day you return...
Did you know that taking off a bra with teeth burns ninty calories?
ever had one of those days where you say fuck it and lick the inside of a bag of chips
I've been here 20 minutes and a sweaty naked man has kissed me on the cheek.
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