We were chasing that deer in the quad and next thing I remember I woke up in my RAs bed. I'm probably in trouble.
girl you didnt miss much. except me passing out for 3 hours AT JOBBIE NOONER on some random's boat. i was topless, then completely naked. heard girls were throwing ice cubes at me. i was useless. remember nothing.
..and then spiked the maple syrup at iHop
Last night you were talking while puking saying, "ahh the shoes and the purse, I'm gonna have to wash those"
When were having sex he was mumbling some guys name. If he wasn't as hot as he is I'd be concerned.
she just punched a dude and called him a peasant for not drinking fast enough in flip cup.
i wanna pet his head its so fluffy. were gonna open a petting zoo
I only wish the guy being lead around by his cock at the drag show was the weirdest part of my night.
Literally I thought my ears were pouring out blood. That high.
I've watched enough of my roommate's imported Japanese satellite to know when the exchange students are calling me a whore.
Just saw a dude walk out of the parking. Garage in a diaper and tutu. He had a handle in one hand and a toy bow in the other
LOL its 11 am
A girl just asked me if we had pregnancy tests and a coworker had to stop me from telling her I was a pregnancy test. THAT is why I don't drink at work.
Split a bottle of Johnny Walker and then decided to eat a shit ton of peanut butter. That was a rough bed to wake up in
I planned to shave today but it's Friday the 13th I might cut something
Ugh... The hoe gods giveth and the hoe gods taketh away.
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