Dude. I haven't taken a shit in a week.
Try anal, it works wonders.
This row in front of you is like duck, duck, goose - but eating disorder, eating disorder, failed eating disorder
Chris' response to jim throwing up was taking off his shirt and saying WHO WANTS A BONER
Yeudjkisdjxbfceryuj. i love having a qwerty keyboard just so i can do that.
i would totally change schools right now just to be that new girl everyone wants
i guess this means i'm going to be wearing knee socks during sex again
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
Whatever you gave me is making me lactate
I'm microwaving a frozen bottle of Two Buck Chuck while watching The Proposal with my housemate. I'm not sure what success is like, but I'm fairly confident this isn't it.
I feel like when purchasing hard liquor on a Monday I also need to buy a happy 21st bday card to not seem so pathetic
Just realized i left my bra at his house. WHY do i suck at one night stands?!
I don't even remember what he looks like. All I know is he's 6 foot 100. I like that.
Got stuck at my fwb place for three days because I decided sex was more important than my safety in the weather. Worth it.
Despite breaking my phone, thumb, and my dignity, last night was pretty good.
Awesome. I did a rain go away dance. And it went away. Nbd just cotrollin the weather with my mind and sweet dance moves
Randomize
