she is graduated, working for the school, and puking in the bathroom of a frat house. she wants brush her hair so she doesnt "look trashy". im in love.
i can't find my house
we droppd you off right in front! i even walked you to the steps less then 3 mins ago.
i'm pretty sure my house moved.
he just made me do "this little piggy" to his toes.
Bruises. Everywhere. Table sex is dangerous
My vagina senses are tingling. I know your here.
came home to a trail of roses from the door halfway up the stairs. but my nonsingle roommate lives downstairs. idk if they celebrated on the stairs or if some girl tried to woo me last night and i don't remember
I think you'll be amused to know that I achieved the impossible feat of tripping over my own dick
I woke up to him peeing by our bedroom door. I yelled at him to go to the bathroom and he just kept peeing while he walked there. This is a new low.
A prostitute stole us beer at 3 am
Hey it's Males-You-Probably-Wish-You-Hadnt-Had-Sex-With Monday. MYPWYHHSWM
It's a good thing he's hot, because it seemed like he was trying to do CPR on my private parts
I'm shopping for Mother's Day cards while waiting for my herpes medication. What is life.
tbh I think I just dated him for his dogs in the first place.
Im legit just salty with everyone who has a penis right now
I dont know which is weirder.. the fact that i just watched our mom kick ass at beer pong and ride the pole like a true fire girl or the fact that ive never felt closer to her in my life.
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