I think I left something in your back seat.... It was my integrity
just found a shoebox labled "emergency smoking box"... it has a lightbulb, 2 potatoes, a dried up flower, and a button that says "stop drop and roll". what did we do last night?!
Actions speak louder than pants.
It was like good, clean fun, but with bodyshots.
There's a bed on the roof. The window behind it is too small for it to go through. I'm impressed.
Aww you are cute. With your penis. And failures.
Think I just saw your homeless guy on High Street. Did you give him back his crutch?
Let me shower first- i smell like sex and rock climbing (not so sure how that happened)
I'm pretty sure I just crapped out my pancreas. I have 2 of those, right?
You'd be surprised how many calories hedonism burns.
her spring break bucket list included "break into The Swamp, blow him where Tebow has Tebowed"
Like I feel like I use my high IQ for the wrong things
She really has to stop the coke at some point. Won't she run out of money eventually?
Won't she run out of nose eventually?
I'm going through what feels like a break up with beer. I'm emotionally distraught from it's lack of presence.
When did i become the Rickety Cricket of my own life?
Randomize
