Honey, If i waited till marriage I wouldnt know what a dick tasted like.
Can you believe The 5th Element didn't get best fight scene in 1997?! I'm still bitter. 12 years later.
Haha how do you remember that?
HOW COULD I FORGET?!
guess you're going to miss out on a groin massage and a frosty vagina
Just watched the couple I sit for and 4 of their friends shotgun beers like college kids. Please let this be us when we get older.
Idk how hard you fucked her, but you managed to leave permanent ass prints on my tempurpedic mattress.
Would be in best interest to sanitize the DVDs
Don't worry, I could have been accepted their by waving my dick at the admissions building.
We fucked on shrooms. It's like his dick was a beam of light and when I came I turned into a prism and my orgasms were made of rainbows.
A man in a black on black escalade pulled up next to me, and told me he was sent to pick me up by you.
His name is Tyreece. He will take you to the weed emporium, population me.
I have so many plans for this weekend and sobriety is not invited.
There's no discreet way to sneak a cucumber into the shower lol
You sent me a naked picture of you as a child? How is that normal
Every FB picture she has looks like it's from the POV of the guy she's blowing
It's volleyball. Just do it. You want to look sporty. Save sexy librarian for another day.
While I'm here in reality dreaming of catching chili cheese fries with my mouth out of t shirt guns like Jesus is real
Randomize
