booty call
i swear to god if you come over i will kick you in the pussy.
im trying to pick out the cookie crumbs from my adderall. it is a lot harder than it seems.
A disheveled girl in front of me just looked down, shrieked, and yelled to the girl next to her "what is this" while pointing at two large white stains near the crotch of her black jeans. I love that Thursdays are weekends, it makes awesome Friday mornings
Jesus people on campus asked me what i do for joy. I said i love sinning especially pre-marital sex.
you got me arrested i just think that goes without question you owe me a blowjob
Is it wrong in Austin to talk to the homeless while I feed a bird my chips??
No he's here. We were watching Harry Potter stoned as shit and he fell asleep with his head in my lap. I'll figure out what to do with him after Harry gives Dobby the sock.
I'M NOT READY TO BE AB ADULT YET!!!
I'm having a hard time existing right now. When I figure out how it works ill be over.
Is it counter productive to ride on my exercise bike with a cocktail in hand?
It was Thanksgiving sex. I was thankful for it. Need I say more?
He is more interested in finding his sweater than he is in having sex with me. It better be a great fucking sweater.
Poor guy. Tried so hard to get out of the friend zone. I had to make out with someone in front of him to put him in his place.
He went down on me while i ate a whole 7/11 pizza. New level unlocked
One of the Mormon boys that comes to the door is really sexy and I always think 'I would absolutely destroy your faith'
Randomize