The worst part was when my mom got more drunk than anyone else and started doing the Time Warp.
His moose knuckle keeps winkin at me
I hope you get used to having plenty of sperm because you're never gonna get any.
Haha oh wow he'd be perfect. He's got everything MTV looks for in a real world cast member. Gay. Tool. From Methuen
All was going smooth until he pulled a condom out of his collection he kept in a Cheesy Gordita Crunch Box from Taco Bell.
I just woke up naked clutching a Taco Bell bag.
she added emergen-c to the bong-water bro, brilliant.
She's laying here with her head in my lap stoned, eating Doritos, whining about her boyfriend, and listening to Cher. Fuck the friend zone.
I walking on her passed out on her bed, clutching a burrito and the walking dead dvd on replay.
If magic marker is safe for kids, it should be safe for cats...right?
I just found your ripped underwear on my chandelier. Care to explain?
I noticed while having sex on Friday that I have great endurance. CrossFit works.
At one point I was convinced he was a snake and was going to eat me And I just accepted it
Shia just rubbed his beard the way I do all the time and maybe he's my soul sister. This live stream is life changing.
This chick just walked out of the men's room with molly all over her nose and her shirt half unbuttoned. She nodded to all of us and said "gentlemen" as she exited
Randomize
