oh and i really hope miley falls off this mountain she is climbing
and on the fourth day, god made foam parties.
True as that may be, are you coming to the birth of my imaginary child or not?
I can't do a walk of shame with a sombrero full of baby chickens
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We got the idea to smoke under his bed because, and I quote, "it'd be just like going camping"
just tried to puke while my RA was trying to puke in the stall next to me.bonded for life
And then I passed out in my towel and was woken up by my roommate introducing me to her trick for the night.
next time im at a party and go to fist bump the dude who took my virginity two years ago PLEASE STOP ME
Sorry about all of the penis things that happened last night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I found them. Thank God. Now I'm gonna have to take a Xanax for the panic attack I almost had trying to find my Xanax.
Last night was good. Things got bad when I found a sledge hammer.
you just rode your bike home from a one night stand in a stolen skirt with no underwear and you're telling ME to reevaluate life choices?!
Wait you actually sent a text to your self saying “love you I miss you"?
You went home with a guy at 11... than returned to the bar at 1
Nothing says “I spent too much in Vegas” quite like eating a jar of pickles for dinner and planning on cream of celery soup for breakfast tomorrow.
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