I bet farrah fawcett is having words with michael jackson in heaven for stealing her thunder
Jack off faster Americas best dance crew is beyonce themed
he took off his pants and apologized in advance if I thought he was too small.
She was asian and in a relationship... my two weaknesses
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The hardest part of getting a new computer is deliberating whether to start the cycle of porn and viruses all over again.
The last thing I remember is funneling tequila out of a pink noodle.
Also, I think I'm too drunk to be at the gym right now. But how sober do you need to be for IM volleyball?
U know that drunk state, where at 930 the next morning your sitting in a bath in ur bathing suit trying to sober up...yeah. That's where i am..
You are my best friend, but sometimes best friends need to punch each other in the face
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You woke up, mumbled something about forgetting to lock the truck at work, slapped my ass, then passed out again...
It was like in the Christmas carol when the guy pulls his robe back and 2 small children appear... except this time it was a massive scrotum
He kept telling me that it stood for Sex Utility Vehicle
I figured it out! The supermoon explains how I managed to have sex with 3 dudes in 3 nights without leaving the apartment.
Her cop pants made me imagine I was riding a unicorn and by unicorn I mean her face
He's hot, clean, can actually cook, and best of all isn't a narcissistic prick. I found a unicorn.
Ride that fucker.
Randomize