K got coke dick during a threesome with two strippers. Say no to drugs.
I introduced my face to asphalt last night. They didn't get along.
So he flipped me over and suddenly went limp then told me he was thinking about his ex.
so you punched his junk, right?
We were so tired we rock paper scissored for who would be on top. I won.
so he came over for the first time and i completely forgot i had pictures of him printed out from facebook on my wall and a newspaper article with him in it.. you can guess that it lead for an awkward situation.
I just filled out my 2010 Census drunkenly. I'm single handedly throwing it off.
Not sure if you carved a butthole or vagina in that pumpkin but that didn't stop high Phil from mounting. My study group is horrified.
Alright, who started the "how long till dereck gets deported from Australia" pool? I want in on that.
True freedom is running around a sex club in former power plant in Berlin wearing a boots, a jock
I peppersprayed myself last night. Sigh.
She only fucks to metal. I don't know whether to marry her or run for the hills.
I just wish I had a snapshot of his attempted front flip off the bar. There are some things that are worth getting a life ban for, and the moment of impact with his foot and that lady's face was one of those things.
I think I achieved my goal of being high for 24 hours in the same week I promised myself I wouldn't smoke anymore
Last night I ate a candle out of a strippers ass.... I guess it was an okay night.
I told him he had to put his dick inside of me at approx 1159 to ensure it was birthday sex. i was 19 when he entered me.. came out 20. winning.
Randomize
