your dick doesn't do me any good in arizona
He gets a blow job and all I get is a huge scar on my arm ... how is this fair?
There are fucking limits. Jerking another guy off in the bar toes the line.
Dude. Remember the only two rules I set for that? Always have a sober friend and don't do drugs with a fat chick.
I just spend twenty minutes scrubing the "Happy Birthday" off of my vagina. He's never gonna forget this.
so, she was so drunk she tried stabbing me with a corn dog stick
Its a first. Never been peed on in a line to concert. First time for everything.
She kept telling me it was a squirtgun.
I didn't know whether to laugh at the fact that a dog bit his balls or throw up cause my dad was telling me a story involving his balls.
next time im at a party and go to fist bump the dude who took my virginity two years ago PLEASE STOP ME
Would it be inappropriate to do a science fair project on whether the type of drunk a person is is determined by nature or nurture
dude you're not even a fucking science major
On celebration of the Supreme Court ruling I feel it is our patriotic duty to have a threesome
I think I might get 604 tattooed on my ass tonight...
Please keep in mind you are asking relationship advice from a girl who fucked a guy just because we have the same name. Just keep that in mind.
Bro. I traded my coat. I have a Raiders coat now.
I promised to leave my panties on but I didn't promise to not have sex
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