Are we still dressing up as garden gnomes for halloween?
No. I would like to get laid again before I graduate.
being a part time student has turned me into a full time alcoholic.
he actually said the words "do you want to pet the lizard?" with a straight face as he unzipped his pants
It smells like someone died in our apartment and ya'll used some random orifice of his body to smoke weed out of. Side note, how did we get a guitar?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
My mom now keeps ice cubes on hand for my bong water. We may be able to work this relationship out.
I will accept it in the form of tooth necklace but if you have better ideas I am open to suggestions.
He drunkenly stumbled over to me and told me my "crotch looks spectacular tonight"..... i think this could work
You can't have your cake and publicly stick your dick in it too
My life has come to reading articles about dating an ex heroin addict. I'm doing well.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Neither a grow-er nor a show-er. More like a no-er. If he didn't have testicles, I'm not sure you could tell he was a male, even standing there naked. There will be no second date.
tom claimed she had a star tattooed around her buttonhole. i am not prepared for this era of skankyness
Want to do me the honour of waxing my legs again before I go to Mexico? I feel like it's a tradition we shouldn't break.
You tried to wave to Meg on Family Guy and got upset because she wasn't waving back
Lol if he questions who I am I'm gonna send him a pic of his boxers
How do you explain to your mom that you let your friend stab you in the leg while drunk and high on coke?
Randomize