So, how was the dinner
Just like the ex wife, cold, fatty, and expensive.
so Brent and I ordered you a drink then realized you don't live here. I drank it.
Just cropdusted the office
i just saw a white kid with an afro using a martini shaker as a coffee thermos. go college.
I don't know if it was the room or her, but as soon as the pants came off, it smelt like a locker room and old man farts.
I was high enough to understand and function with 'flip' while playing brick breaker
Damn. I don't think I could ever be that high.
Ive been using palmolive to shower with for he last week, dont tell me about not having money. Im heading to the bar r u going.
just spent $80 on an im sorry breakfast from mcdonalds for everyone sleeping in my apartment for being a drunkass and locking everyone out of the apartment at 2am.
I almost bumped into a man wrapped only in a blanket at 10 am
So apparently having sex with your co-worker in the bathroom at the staff party can get you fired.
That's brilliant but could get us arrested. Give me shots until I shout LET'S DO THIS
So after we found out he wasnt throwing up blood in was just hawaiian punch and we all failed breathalyzers the cop drove us around like a taxi and brought us back to the apartment
I'm dancing with a sandwich I just made cause I'm so happy how delicious it tastes, that high haha
Aw. You're having cute FaceTime with your fiance, I'm trying to convince myself not to booty call a 42 year old. #adulting
I'm always down for nudity.
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