As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
adderall flavored popcorn. yes we did it and its awesome
2nd fun fact: he has a square tan line around his dick.
So the crazy cock blocking bitch sent her a picture of her boobs using MY phone and said: he's busy at the moment
This is what happens when you live with someone you met on Grindr
Bone him for me, BONE HIM TWICE FOR ME.
I just watch that 70s show all day and blaze whenever they do. It's nice being part of the circle
Something about Sunday night screams phone sex
It was super embarrassing when I had to tell my brother, in front of my mother, that my wifi password was Drinkupbitches. Thanks for providing that lovely family moment.
We dug deep emotionally while eating cereal
No more weed for you
She's been drunk for three days now
Like three straight days. 72 hours
She's been covered in glitter for the last two and somehow she found a monkey
And now I have a massive dip in and a Bloody Mary that would catch on fire if you put a flame close to it, with no pants on... At 8:15Am. Being single is pretty legit
I told people at my moms bar that all I needed to sober up was to get my asshole licked, and I blame you 110%.
My dick has a subreddit
I'm not asking for life coaching, I'm just asking if you know where I left my underpants.
Randomize
