If she wasn't my friend I'd think she was a huge slut
i almost hope i AM knocked up so i can ruin the rest of his life
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
It's been two days. My balls feel like watermelons.
she puked as i came inside her. that has to mean something.
what are we doing this weekend?
I have enough booze to get us through Armageddon...which basically means that on Sunday we will have to make a trip to the liquor store.
With the amount of g's you put on going I'm gonna guess you're drinking alone again
You have all of her herpes and none of my sympathy
He's minimum effort, but maximum fuck.
We still on for coffee?
Cream and sugar. Deliver to planned parenthood in 45.
So one possible side effect of women taking Viagra is that my tongue feels swollen. You having any?
She ordered an O'douls. That was the end of that date
Btw I'm playing passed out so you can get laid but obviously you need to take the offense just ask him if he wants to go to bed and leave a cigg on the counter
I just do things that aren't classy the classy way.
OMG OMG OMG I just throwed up in his pillow case when he wentto start the sho wer, time to grab my bra and bounce!!!
Wow.
Randomize
