you're like the ceasar milan of boners... you understand them on a different level.
thats the mark of a good guy. when you can period all over his leg and he still thinks you're beautiful!
chasing schnapps with beer is a terrible idea. never been drunk at 3PM before. please help please please please please
whatever a "slut portfolio" is, mine is apparently almost complete
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Oh my god. I'm sorry if i peed on you last nite. I am truly disgusting
$5 off purchases of eighths or more today only. Happy tax-free weekend. -Your consumer-minded pot dealer
I think she's perpetually drunk
It's all she knows
Dude. I knoww what ur thinking. Yes, your hand hurts. It's because you fell through a window. If and when you wake up, go to the hospital.
We'll wreck the fuck out of my furniture. How often does one really get the chance to fuck through a table with no negative consequences?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Needless to say, she forgave him, they're back together, and I'm seriously considering having a lesbian year.
Let's get a hotel room this time. I really don't want to sleep in a Dennys parking lot again.
Like I fucked him in the shower at 3 am when I had classes all day the next day so he can't say I'm not dedicated
Do NOT approach him. He has sex with everything. LITERALLY everything, and I DO mean everything. He's so horny we once caught him with his dick in a pumpkin. A legitimate honest to God pumpkin that he bored a hole in
I'm at a Tim Horton's and two girls just came in handcuffed to eachother
Throwing up in a storm drain... Not my finest moment.
But my shoes looked boss
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