I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
I understand Curling. That high.
just wondering who decided to put a cup of throw up in my fridge
My sister got her picture in the pub crawl section of the paper today and my dad said to me "why can't you be more like her?"
Just thought i should tell someone im on the roof, if i pass out up here because no one found me, im behind the chimney
I wonder if you can snort coke upside down
She gave me a foot massage while her friend rode me. Your gf puked into the oscolating fan. How were our nites alike?
Besides asking our teacher if he enjoyed being fisted did I have any other tragic moments last night?
I fell down the stairs while taking the dog out last night. I was laying there with the dog licking me face and my neighbor just stepped over me
Watching boy meets world, drinking left over pink panty droppers and coloring in a my little pony coloring book. This is my Monday night
You were so drunk that you didn't even notice when I switched out your shot of jäger for a shot of maple syrup...before or after you drank it.
it will be just like last year but no clogged toilets and more costumes.
I need to wear something that says I would have sex with you but I'm not going to
idk how I feel so profoundly understood by someone whose latest tweet is "labia majora's mask." but I do.
he called her and asked for me. he wants to do dinner and a movie
her booty call wants to take you to dinner?
Randomize
