even if everyone didnt know them screaming eskimo brothers and high fiveing over my head kinda gave it away
is it a bad thing if he can only get off when i start talking like one of the girls from Jersey Shore??
I may do that, fyi I'm even more sore than I was yesterday. It's like the ghost of your dick is still inside me.
You both must have been completely wasted because every once in a while we would hear you both stop and start singing to each other. At one point it was taylor swift.
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Doing shrooms is fine until you get raped by curtains
he does have a point though, watching you drink makes me never want to drink again
Is "incoherent" a legit goal to strive for tonight? Or should I stay sober enough to fuck who I can?
You know you need to hit the gym when you're not strong enough to get the cork outta the wine bottle. And you know you're a drunk when that's the only motivation to do exercises
Don't forget: you only show your tits for the good beads. Be judicious.
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You started drinking at 2:30, did you really think you would be able to remember?
I put xanax in the cake batter
Did you really? It all makes sense now.
Just walked by the barren window naked in a family neighborhood. Who needs dignity.
please let it be arousing that I used numbers to figure out how well I'd give you head
I swear every time I see him he's either dancing or trying to touch people
I have aggressive nipples.
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