Third unemployed latin in my bed this week. I'm on a roll
Sorry I totally forgot to text you back. When you texted me I was at work at the pharmacy and it was stupid busy. And then of course I had my 8 hour "shoot me b/c half of Loyola comes in to buy plan B" shift.
yeah it's now facebook official. i can no longer pretend shes my girl on the side
Sweet. Might not hurt to poop on the floor anyway.
I'm not even planning on drinking that much tonight.. but I'm writing "emergency contact number" and your number on my hand just in case
season finale of lost and an oz of weed. tonight my mind is going to be blown.
This is the time you want your cat to have telepathy with you. To know if the guy downstairs left.
OMG stoned with flashing lights behind me, I was freaking out until I realized I wasn't driving my couch
No that means he must've used the nipple clamps
I found a ladder. I don't know where I am. Gonna climb it. I feel like aladin
you were yelling that somebody needed to take your bra off with such enthusiasm my first thought was that you were on fire.
I asked her if she could eat some Doritos so when we made out it would taste awesome
bitch dont make me pour hotsauce in your vagina
I drove them away with my sparkling personality and LOTR references.
Yeah I knew you'd like him. He's emotionally and physically self destructive.
We would have so much to talk about!
Randomize
