when a 14 year old is judging you, you know you've had too much to drink
i called my mom using *69 and said this was the principal and Matt has a snow a day today. she believed me.
i take my contacts out every time we fuck so i cant see all the stretch marks
Wait til she sees the pic of her vag in court docs.
He's currently rapping every word to 'more money more problems' at what could be a over 30s gay bar. I'm not sure yet. More info to come.
Its so fun. We're having a music war with the boat next to us. They have strippers.
Stayed out til 7 am.... Did u know there's a guy who goes up and down the quad at that hour playing bagpipes?
The Supreme Court upheld health insurance. If that's not an excuse to get hospital drunk, I don't know what is.
The lady sitting right behind me on the bus has baby birds in her purse. Shes feeding them bugs from a cup with a pair of tweezers... I love san francisco!
When I see myself in tank tops and push up bras I seriously wonder why I'm not President.
I made a side by side comparison of her Facebook pic and the chick on the anti meth billboards. Plus a ven diagram showing mostly shared physical attributes. I sent u the PowerPoint. You were sufficiently warned.
That's how I like my men: traumatized and crying in a ball
there was 'chicken suit porn' in my search history.......also 'scuba diving porn'
He had really great hair, but he told me he's been in a psych ward three times. I mean I know I'm a psych major, but that's too much.
Please come check out theses cougars grinding on a pole. I feel like they're showing us up and we need a duel stat
Randomize
