so i woke up to her 8 year old asking for a bowl of cereal...
just found out my sister was breast fed and i was not...pretty upset about that.
yea ive hooked up with like half those guys
and i've hooked up with the other half...when our powers combine, we are captain slutbag
sticking your finger down your throat to make yourself throw up is bulimia, not morning sickness, so no, I don't think you're pregnant.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Got to see someone fall down the stairs while holding hot coffee and a folder full of papers. Best Monday ever.
All I remember was yelling at him, "Its becasue of people like you that it took us so long to get to the moon!"
Her parties are sponsored by Valtrex. This might not be your best idea.
You took a fire extinguisher off the wall in the hallway to play Ghostbusters.
I feel like I need to get a restraining order against him but I'd probably be the one to break it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I mean how do you tell a nurse in the ER that you dislocated your knee giving a blowjob to your boyfriend.
Very innocently.
You may genuinely find a use for the siphon. But the bag of human hair is less likely.
I will be naked everywhere
You asked me if you could throw up in my shoe.
I accidentally flashed three cops last night. Stone cold sober.
We all love a big dick, but you’re going to develop a reputation if you keep asking every guy at the bar ‘how big your dick’
That’s all I’m saying
Randomize