I have a deodorant stick dedicated to my balls.
IM SAVING ALL MY LOVE FOR YOU
I don't want it.
Some dude at the gas station right now is buying a 30 rack of beast and a can of cat food. Happy Thanksgiving.
Oh shit. Easter I forgot. Maybe we should leave the illegal stuff for when Jesus is less present.
my mom just wingman'd for me at a bar. i really don't know what else to say.
That still doesn't explain why you thought it was a good idea to paint a cow on my guitar
i will trade you pizza and a blowjob for a fifth of vodka.
do i get to eat the pizza while you give me the blowjob?
Now back to adults eating hotdogs.
The world is a different place when I'm actually having sex
I hurt myself, but I'm pretty sure I saved the carpet.
So basically I really like drugs AND banging cops and it's starting to get complicated
WINE AND FILM. TALK ABOUT AN UPGRADE FROM NETFLIX AND CHILL.
Was it cause you feel bad for the ridiculousness my vagina goes through because same
yea so the plan to relive our college glory days was great and all but ending up in the er with alcohol poisoning was crossing the line
He's eating me out right now. That's how bad he is.
Randomize
